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May 25, 2004

The Secret Is Out!!!

From here

Plan For Domination

I believe President Bush and Donald Rumsfeld's thinking goes along these lines:
The American population is growing about 0.92 percent a year; 66.7 percent of that very same population is between the ages of 15 and 64 and these same people are having about 14 babies a year per 1,000. At this rate, we need to greatly reduce the male half of the population.
Without the males, females will slow down and, in some cases, stop breeding. This will move us in the direction of a more controllable number of people, mostly weak women. By sending large quantities of men to fight this war in Iraq that we've cooked up, we can eliminate many of the stronger ones.
The children who lose fathers in this war, especially the boys who won't have a father's guidance, will succumb to depression and have possible suicidal tendencies. The surviving female children will be hardened by losses and by their mothers who turn bitter and tough. We'll give these children one great thing to hold onto and strive toward, an absolute sense of patriotism; not just faith in our country, but unshakable faith in our president and other leaders since we are in fact guided by God himself.
We will make machines out of these children, willing to die for any course we decide to lay out for them. We will keep some of the weaker ones in the factories to build our weapons and machines for our continued plan of world domination.

Kathleen Anderton
Salt Lake City

That`s an actual letter. Some people honestly think like that. Ace Of Spades where I originally found it, gives a good breakdown of it with one especially hilarious comment Here
Go read it.


May 25, 2004 at 10:35 PM | Permalink


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Well, Mister and Misses America, that's all for tonight's show. Thank you, Kathleen, for participating in "The American Experience!" Ladies and gentlemen, as a consolation prize for not placing in this nation's "Top Three Brains", Kathleen will take home a luxurious set of Oneida Flatware with place settings for six! We all wish Kathleen the best of luck in her future endeavors as the model for a forlorn pastry in the window of a shop nobody ever actually goes into.
Until then, keep smiling and, remember:
Save that soap!

Posted by: spd rdr at May 25, 2004 11:04:33 PM

...and then we can use brainless asshat clones like Kathleen for food...

Posted by: Cassandra at May 25, 2004 11:09:26 PM

Yep, she`s a keeper all right.

Posted by: joatmoaf at May 25, 2004 11:10:10 PM

You know, she sounds rather like that nutty Pakistani guy my son arrested... maybe if we all agree with her conspiracy theories, she'll shut up.

Posted by: Cassandra at May 25, 2004 11:10:50 PM

I suspect that she mis-spelled her own name. Hehehehe....asshat.

Posted by: Pile On® at May 25, 2004 11:12:58 PM

There you go again... that word...

That's three.

Posted by: Cassandra at May 25, 2004 11:15:44 PM

My favorite comment was this:

When they came for the Cryonically-Suspended Incubator Women, I said nothing because I'm not a Cryonically-Suspended Incubator Woman.

When they came for the Legally Huntable Sub-Helots, I said nothing because I'm not a Legally Huntable Sub-Helot.

When they came for the Cyberclone Slaves, I said nothing because I'm not a Cyberclone Slave.

So when they came for me, I invented the Boson Reversal Disintegrator and it turned out not to matter that none of those other people were around any more.

Posted by: Paul Zrimsek at May 25, 2004 09:59 AM

Posted by: joatmoaf at May 25, 2004 11:29:37 PM

Riddle me THAT and tell me what it means.

Posted by: joatmoaf at May 25, 2004 11:30:35 PM

My head hurts.

Posted by: spd rdr at May 26, 2004 6:11:22 AM

Uh, I hate to tell you this but I have heard the same diatribe on some discussion boards and it is part of the reason I am here learning...keeping my mouth open, but after that post, I will definately shut it. I don't like swallowing flies. Ptuiptuiptui. Icky Poo.

Posted by: La Femme Crickita at May 26, 2004 8:47:17 AM

So which one of those are you Cricket?

A Cryonically-Suspended Incubator Women?

A Legally Huntable Sub-Helots?

Or a Cyberclone Slave?

Posted by: joatmoaf at May 26, 2004 5:40:57 PM

Imagine the thought processes that went into making that letter. Either she thought this diatribe all by herself, earning her way onto that great liberal planet Uranus, or someone told her about this great plot.

More tinfoil, we need more tinfoil...

Posted by: Purple Raider at May 26, 2004 5:47:58 PM

It's always disheartening & frightening to think these people may well have offspring! Poor kids!

Posted by: CKCat at May 26, 2004 10:27:44 PM

Looking much better here! I've got to get out and stop by more often. 8-}

The only thing Klingon Kathleen failed to mention is the new, improved armed forces, where all the boys and girls share foxholes, danger, and the excitement of traveling to exotic lands, meeting interesting people, and killing them.

I'm also more confused than usual; I thought the end of gender segregation in the military had to do with sending more women into combat. Since the gals are physically incapable of toting as much ammunition and other field gear, won't they be more vulnerable in an intense firefight? Or will the male-kill ratio go up when that primal protective urge kicks in and the guys start sharing their remaining clips with their G.I. Jane counterparts? Will G.I. Joe's treatment of enemy prisoners be attenuated by his having witnessed the ageless brutalities of combat inflicted on the womenfolk fighting alongside him?

Asshat...I like that; it's a Golden Oldie. Can we cuss on this site, if it's tasteful and in context? 8-P

I really gotta get out more often...

Posted by: Possumtrot™ at May 27, 2004 12:22:23 AM

Well lookie, another scrappler found his way here. Good to see ya.

Posted by: Pile On® at May 27, 2004 7:58:24 AM


We try to keep the cussing to a minimum, but asterisks come in handy :) I don't mind asshat - for some reason that doesn't seem like cussing to me and a person has to be able to vent. If you say something too heinous, it will just get edited but no one will hunt you down and kill you. Having been censored many a time on ScrappleFace, I'm hardly in a position to sit in judgement.

We're definitely not as 'family-friendly' as Scott. And just about every thread gets hijacked.

And welcome :)

Posted by: Cassandra at May 27, 2004 9:42:29 AM

And Cass likes it when you get crabby.

Posted by: spd rdr at May 27, 2004 2:23:06 PM

Well spd, I must admit I do rather like it when you get crabby...

But say rather that, like Valentine, that I am content:

To make a virtue of necessity
And live, as you do, in this wilderness
Amid the jet noise.
No general, I
But merely Cassandra...

Posted by: Cassandra at May 27, 2004 2:46:05 PM

You old grey ghost. Stop by more often. Watch out for the haiku; it's everywhere.
Minimize cussing except when necessary: asshat seems to be the order of the day.
Maximize witty banter or pointed remarks: we need a good laugh.
Beware of: Pile On's personal life. It's a minefield.

Posted by: Don Brouhaha, known to many as Insta-Moron at May 27, 2004 11:17:28 PM

Your tellin' me.

The bad grammer is for you Possum.''''''apostrophes are so overrated'''''

Posted by: Pile On® at May 27, 2004 11:20:52 PM